105 Saskatchewan Federation of Police Officers I answered YES to some of these questions. What does it mean? If you answered yes to some questions, you may be getting into an abusive relationship. Even if your friend apologizes for the abuse, this is often part of the “cycle of violence”. Abuse rarely stops. It happens over and over and it usually gets worse. People may try to make excuses for the behaviour, but there is no excuse for abuse. Maybe I should try harder and we would be happy? Many people blame themselves for “upsetting” their partner. But if your special friend acts mean and controlling, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. You should not have to walk on egg shells to keep somebody else happy. Getting Help if Things go Wrong Many people are ashamed to speak out or ask for help if a partner is hurting them. They may think that no one will take the abuse seriously because it is happening in a relationship. All abuse is wrong and completely unacceptable! Some forms of abuse that happen in a relationship may also be offences under the Criminal Code. A few examples include: • Assaults - of all forms including attempts and threats to assault • Sexual assaults - of all forms including attempts and threats to assault [Remember, no one has the right to force another person to have sex – not even a spouse, partner or somebody you are dating.] • Uttering threats • Criminal harassment; i.e., stalking • Intimidation • Breach of a court order such as an undertaking, a peace bond, a probation order or other court orders What can I do if the person I am dating or living with is abusing me? If someone is abusing you, there several things you can do to get help: • Talk to a close friend or a family member • If you feel safe, talk to the abuser about your feelings • Find out about support services, such as counseling, transition houses, mental health services, etc. • Check out page 2 of the Telephone Book – Abuse Information pages • Ask the service providers you contact to help you make a safety plan • Contact the Department of Social Development • If you have been harmed or threatened, or you are fearful, call the Police – in an emergency call 911 • Leave the abusive situation and go somewhere safe (i.e. stay with a family member, go to a shelter or a transition house for women, move into a hotel, etc.) • Talk to your doctor, counselor, or someone in your faith community. legal-info-legale.nb.ca
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